Didn't go to school today,hoping to complete all of the pending projects and homework. Well,no such luck really coz all i ended up doing was wasting yet another day. I don't know how this is going to work out. Even last night was spent crying. I couldn't breathe. And i can't talk to my parents about it. They already have a lot handle..add to that a mega fucked teen and they would lose it. And talking to my 'friends' about it would only result in alarmed stares that show their fucking concern and sympathy like i'm some sick patient. I don't know what i should do. I thought of calling up my 'best' friend but i know that even if she understood,she would only say "uhuh" after an 11 minute pause. And then i thought of telling all of this to my boyfriend. That would have been possible last year perhaps when we weren't so eager to judge the other person and carefully avoid all forms of conversation that happened to include real problems. We've become so good at it, y'know. Good at avoiding everything that might make us see that 'we' are not really perfect and that 'we' have already disintegrated to 'I' and 'You'..
In short..i go back to being so freakin alone again.
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